Part 2: When Schools Can't Cope: Understanding the Provision Crisis
The phone calls from school have become all too familiar. "You need to come and pick her up”. "We can’t tolerate this behaviour at school." "We're not sure we can meet her needs." As both a Clinical Psychologist and parent, I hear these phrases from both sides - in my clinical practice and in my own life, with my own child. They reflect a system in crisis, where schools are struggling to provide the support our children desperately need.
The Reality of Waiting
When we talk about the specialist provision gap, we're talking about real children waiting months, sometimes years, for appropriate educational placement. These aren't just numbers on a waiting list - they're children losing precious learning time, families facing impossible choices, and potential being lost.
I sit with parents in my clinical practice who are watching their children's mental health deteriorate while they wait. Some have been out of school for months. Others are struggling through inappropriate placements that cause daily distress. If you're one of these parents, I want you to know - this isn't your fault, and you're not alone.
Why Current Approaches Aren't Working
Our current educational policies, with their emphasis on behaviour management and compliance, are creating actively hostile environments for many children. When we prioritise control over connection, when we see behaviour as something to manage rather than understand, we create circumstances where many children simply cannot cope.
The government's behaviour hub approach exemplifies this problem. While well-intentioned, these standardised behaviour policies can be actively harmful to neurodivergent children or those who've experienced trauma. When a child can't process overwhelming sensory input, when they're struggling with anxiety, or when they need movement to regulate, traditional behaviour management approaches often escalate rather than support.
What looks like "challenging behaviour" is often a child communicating distress. What's labelled as "defiance" is frequently anxiety or overwhelm. When we respond with punishment rather than understanding, we risk turning educational challenges into educational trauma.
The Impact on Families
The cost of this crisis extends far beyond education:
Children's mental health suffers
Families face financial strain from reduced work hours
Siblings witness daily distress
Parents' own mental health deteriorates
Communities lose valuable contributions
Working within a system that doesn't understand your child's needs creates a constant state of hyper-vigilance for parents. Every phone call brings dread. Every meeting requires advocacy. Every day demands impossible choices between education and emotional wellbeing.
What Needs to Change
Based on both professional understanding and personal experience, we need:
More specialist provision that truly understands neurodevelopmental differences
Better training for mainstream staff in trauma-informed approaches
Flexible approaches to attendance that prioritize emotional wellbeing
Recognition that different neurotypes need different environments
Acknowledgment of family expertise in their children's needs
Moving Forward
While the current situation feels overwhelming, change is possible. In my next blog, I'll explore what trauma-informed, inclusive education really looks like - because our children deserve environments that support rather than suppress their true potential.
If you're navigating this journey, share your experience in the comments. What challenges have you faced? What support would make a difference? Because while the system might be broken, we don't have to face it alone.
[Next week: "Creating Safety: Building Schools That Work for Everyone"]
